Death by Narcissist

She’ll do what you least expect,
Betray you in ways you never imagined
Turn to stone when your hopes are highest.

She’ll find a way to turn it around,
You’ll take the blame, resent yourself
Love’s no match for her genius.

As soon as you stop hurting,
She’ll seduce you like crazy, only
Setting you up, to break you again.

Debilitating, painful confusion,
Her behavior too unreasonable
To talk about – to admit you allowed..

Becomes your mission, imprisoning,
To see her be fair, show some heart.
it’s hell for you,  to her it’s winning.

 

 

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A Woman I met Watching Super Bowl, Took Up my offer to Watch it blow.

An offer in jest – never thought you’d accept

I’m all out now –  before your eyes, arching

Full reservoir, volatile pressure- shock

Zoomed –  engorged – trunk to shroom,

Your smile escapes, secret amusement betrayed,

The geyser roars, white and thick, precarious beams

Overflowing gush and ooze – your eyes on it all

You smile big – I  empty the last – we feel alive.

drwart-449

Holy Shit, You’re My Accountant

You’ve done my taxes for three years.
I hire you for your diligence
but your body is amazing,
Beautiful how you dress so professional.

I can’t stop thinking about where things went
I ran into you, both of us alone by the beach,
Hiding out mid afternoon with our drinks
More buzzed than we should be that early.

On your third Cosmo, for me Martinis
We found an excuse to walk to my place
Once we arrived – to see my paintings
Lust hijacked our day, reconnecting.

Anatomy never before so efficient
Not half a minute – way up inside,
You began and kept coming, saying
“Oh my god, you feel so amazing.”

When Losing Love

When they haven’t called after a day or a week

When you’re still waiting as a month is approaching

When it’s different this time and you know it’s for good

When you keep loving more and they love you less

When you don’t reach out because they won’t respond

When they need no goodbyes and you can’t say goodbye

When they were your future and want you in their past

When you can’t sleep and you’d rather not wake up

When you don’t know how you’ll be happy without them

When you can no longer get them mad

When who you are stopped being enough

When you feel so alone that you want to throw up

When you can’t imagine forever without them

When you wonder if their love was just imagined

When nobody else will do

When the love of your life no longer wants you

 


 

 

Face In Hands

Life, moving so quickly,
Art seems to have won
This battle for being.

I slipped back in
While trying to engage
Pursuits more rewarding.

The creating owns me
Outside of the ecstasy
it pays off nothing.

The loneliness is crazy
its magnitude  absurd
Had to be, maybe.

Fading and alone
I’m getting old
With no family.

Put my face in hands,
Wondering, is there
Still time for anything?

Face in hands

Taking Silent Measures

Sacrifice, Honor and Desire

True, it’s hard to stereotype and
Generalize people and be right.
But conditions and situations,
Can be unmistakable, universal.

I saw a condition this afternoon
and a total situation last night.
A girl caged by duty and goodness
devoted to someone, somehow loveless.

She’ll be around more and more often
By herself and less with boyfriend or husband
Every opportunity that is safe and looks prudent
Taken, critical sexual attention.

So often, as Sara was before last night
Too moral to cheat or misbehave, they
Hold their breath until instinct takes over
and they gasp into something overboard.

Look around at work and church, and
at the moms with the biggest hearts and smiles
Their eyes often document their wanting
Saying, “take me somewhere and fuck me!”

It’s sad to see, hard to fix their problem
They’re stuck with a lover who can’t or “won’t” them
And won’t with his touch and care describe
How precious and desirable she is to his life.

Sara was with us at the concert last night
Two girls plus her, two guys and no husband
He used the kids as his excuse, please
Sara responded by looking amazing.

We were packed tight for hours
Standing, drinking, sweating, zoning
Sara was in front of me, acting
Taking silent measures, grinding.

We all were squished and bumping parts
Sara moved and rubbed her ass on me,
In ways asses don’t do randomly.
She pushed tighter, honed her alignment.

She didn’t stop when I started growing.
Kept rubbing against me back and forth,
Nobody had a clue what was happening
She nestled relentlessly, I came.

Not a word or touch or evidence
Sara sinned loud with stealth body
Nobody knows but me and my dick
Now I’m buying two of every concert ticket.

Chuck

(what the dick you let into me did to me)

I love you man you’re a horny Fuck
I married you eight years ago
You let a friend put his dick in me
So you could watch and get off.

I was content with having no other
You compared with the best I’d had
We were fine with what you’ve got
Big enough for what I sought.

I knew it was risky fucking your friend
But we both wanted to spice things up
You said it would be crazy hot to see
Promised no issues with jealousy

So easy would it have been to pass
Our sex was basically problem free
You had to see another bowl in your lane
He bowled all strikes like a champion.

Its not my fault that your friend was huge
And his dick stayed hard for so damn long
Blowing thrice playing me an hour non-stop
He made me come so hard I lost my tongue.

If you wanted to see less
You might have checked first
That he didn’t fuck like a God
Nor have a cock from heaven.

You probably didn’t think it through
And told me you wanted me to enjoy
Said you’d get off if the friend made me come
You’d stroke off a load and all would be done.

I said no thanks, I’d feel like a whore
It’s you and not your friend I adore
What if one time just wasn’t enough
Who next would you be having me fuck?

But you begged and pleaded and wanted it so
We’d fuck once, you’d come – end of the show.
You said you could handle seeing us fuck
And not end up hurt or jealous of Chuck.

Chuck was safe and attractive enough
What the hell, what harm could it do
I wanted to please you and bring you to life
So I agreed to do it and be a good wife.

We should have had rules or contingency plans
And learned much more about this friend of yours
Had we only known chuck would bring what he brought
Would have known we would lose to the game that he’s got.

By the look on your face when he started to grow
I knew you hadn’t planned for a donkey show
Did it also surprise you he could last for so long
or that so much cum came out of his dong?

Was it how hard I came or that it didn’t take long
or that I came more than once that bothered you
Maybe my moans turned this engagement so sour
You came right away and we came for an hour?

Did you want me to tell you I was faking it?
You must know I wish you could fuck like him
Why didn’t you say stop if it bothered you
Once he got me off you and I were through.

God and afterlife was the last illusion to go.

God and afterlife was the last illusion to go.
Life with no illusions is hell on earth.

The tooth-fairy and Easter Bunny,
Santa Claus, Lie
Lie, Lie, Lie

Grandparents and Puppy Dogs
Someone’s Mom, Gone
Gone, Gone, Gone

Soul Mate and Celebrity,
Notoriety, No
Show, No-Show

Youth and Time,
Hope, Die
Die, Die, Die

If it is not a lie
If it ever Shows
It will Die
or it will go.

But there’s God right? There’s that deep certainty that keeps you barely transcendent
The first, deepest pillar of our confidence, thank god our religion was the real one
We have this gift of faith. It is why we are going to be okay while others may die
It’s why our future will work out and nobody we love will ever become nothing, die

Then your Grandparents and everyone you knew in their generation die
Then Your parents get ready to die and a few of your friends Die
Animals die and you learn that all the brain parts and parts that make you, you
and the memories stored in your brain of everything you do, die

Then those who were supposedly the ones who did not lie, your link to the sky
Have raped and molested little boys, did they confess? Hell no, they ran
Those that are supposed to be in the most know about God, rape boys
And you’re supposed to believe they really believe in God? Heaven?

There is zero proof of an afterlife and life after death defies all science and comprehension
memories are stored in the brain, this has been proven
So, if you’re in some afterlife and you have no memory of them, you, us
Then you have no self, no identity and no awareness of what it is that remains

There has not been one truly miraculous thing that has ended up real,
Including everything that you have ever come across that seemed magical,
It always ends up a lie or a dream and ultimately, very human and unremarkable.
To dust and wind do fade all the signs of heaven and anything divine..

There’s not a single thing that has ever been found or past down
That has any power beyond us mortal humans walking around.

God and Heaven are the deepest, most important, illusions to go
By the time it finally becomes impossible to believe in God and religion
Everything of lesser importance has already gone, never was
There’s no more magic, nothing else, no more surprises

Life is a nightmare and a horror Show
When there is no trick strong enough
To convince your mind to believe in god
Or make you believe that heaven’s a go.