Seven Ways That Sex is Like Painting

  1. Requires some strokes for anything to happen

  2. You’ll get best results if you prime the canvas

  3. All size brushes can be effective

  4. You can do it sitting or standing

  5. If you don’t wash right after – your equipment gets crusty

  6. It’s nice to do with some music on

  7. Drinking can make it more fun – but harder to finish





Eight Thoughts On Sex, About Time

  1. If you’re not ready for children, hopefully she’ll get it on time.
  2. It may be hard for her to have a good time if he finishes ahead of time.
  3. If he can go a long time, she might arrive time after time.
  4. If you’re still having a hard time after two attempts, hopefully third time’s a charm.
  5. At some point in time, someone’s going to need some down time.
  6. If you both have it all the time, your relationship may likely stand the test of time.
  7. If you don’t include your iPhone, some might say you’re behind the times.
  8. If time stands still, you may be having the time of your life.