I made us Gin and tonics. At first, we looked out over the town, quietly. I used the time to figure out what to do – what was happening.
I talked with Terry for a bit while Perlah used my bathroom. She’d just celebrated her 40th birthday, was divorced and had one son starting his first year at UNLV. She talked about what it’s been like living by herself for the first time. Terry was candid – talked about how ironic that she’s been getting hit on for twenty years, and now that she got the house to herself and can have sex anytime she wants, there’s nobody around to fuck. She had recently added a couple toys to her “collection.”
Perlah returned before I’d heard Terry’s complete life story and all her secrets.
“Terry’s finally got her house to herself and evidently she can’t find someone to, um, help her appreciate her new privacy,” I said.
(What? She shared all this personal stuff, why can’t I discuss it?)
Judging by her response, Perlah had already been briefed on Terry’s situation.
I wasn’t feeling too sorry for Terry – she was quintessential “MILF” – she was already appearing in fantasies and bucket lists all over the world. And, I’m sure many guys would fuck her just to see her breasts. Yes, by “many guys,” I mean, me.
It was around 1:30 when Perlah reminded us that she was expected to be getting off work at 2.
“I should probably leave by 2:30, or 2:45 the very latest.”
I thought it was A fairly generous allowance given her situation.
“Unless…” I schemed, “Maybe they are having you work a second shift to cover for the other dealer who got sick?”‘
“He knows that wouldn’t happen.”
“Speaking of leaving,” Terry said, “I think I’ll be going. Do you want me to walk with you to get an Uber Perlah, or are you good?”
I almost asked Terry to show me her tits – but thankfully I caught the idea before it left my mouth.
(Yes, I too think it’s a bit shallow for a grown man to fixate upon a woman’s knockers.. in fact, I have often wrestled with this question: is it shallow or immoral to want a woman’s body, and if so, how much reason, other than her boobs, do I need in order to want someone’s tits without being shallow? None at all according to author Alain de Botton – who talks about sexual attraction on this youtube video..
Alain thinks we shouldn’t discount physical attraction nor feel shallow or ashamed for appreciating someone’s exterior; because we’re essentially reading their “inside” – identifying and appreciating deeper aspects of a person; furthermore, Alain argues that appreciating, or wanting someone’s body, is how our minds unconsciously read a a person’s genetic history and can predict the healthiness probability of their future offspring.
To explain attraction, Alain suggests that we are all looking for whatever our subconscious feels it lacks from childhood, and we feel attraction when we sense that someone might have it; we desire people who can fulfill our emotional dependencies – basically looking for “a fix,” to to cope with the unconscious trauma of our earliest years. Ultimately, what we’re all just looking for on a deep, subconscious level – including me by wanting to see Terry’s huge tits, is equilibrium. According to Alain anyway.)
“Sure you don’t want another drink?” I asked.
“Tempting, but I should probably get going….”
Perlah walked out my door with Terry and for a moment I thought she might leave with her. They were talking for a few minutes, I could here but not make out what was being said. I was preparing myself for the worst.
Finally, Perlah came back in.
to be continued – see next post for part five