Payton 2nd Interview: Almost too Bad for Posting. Holy shit.

I had planned on posting this last night after the interview, as you shall see, certain factors got in the way.

If you want to read this – you probably should do so now – as I may decide to take it down.

Here is interview #1 that you’ll want to read first if you haven’t:

 

Trigger warning: mature, reality content. Questionable morality. Burn-in-hell behavior.


context: (It’s about 8:35pm Saturday evening, thanksgiving weekend. Payton brought Jill with her – who I met at the bar where I met Payton before the first interview. I have a roaring fire going in the stone fireplace on my back patio, and my back doors open so we can see fire while we do this. Payton & Jill were about an hour late – apparently they had some drinks and girl talk to have on the way.

Sinner: Wow, two for one, I’m honored, thank you for doing this.

Payton: You’re welcome, our pleasure, the fire is a nice touch.

Sinner: It’s a little warm for it, but I’m pretending there is winter here.

Payton: It’s nice. Jill, do you wish to speak?

Jill: Hey there whoever you should be, I’m at a concert right now, shhhhh. Yes, fire is nice, nice to meet you Duncan. (yea I know we met the other night but I was a tiny bit tipsy , doesn’t really count)

Sinner Saint Fireplace

Okay, it was not as “roaring”at this time but

Payton: Tiny bit? Hon, you want to see your texts? you were so gone. It’s okay, you were hurting #noguilt

Sinner: You are at concert right now, what?

Jill: Yes, I’m bad & told a white lie, didn’t now how to explain to husband about going to do an interview at a man’s house who I met at a bar he didn’t now I was at — just easier to be at a concert.

Sinner: I see, it’s’ too bad you feel you can’t tell him the truth. Are you sure it’s okay – no hurt feelings at all if you want to call this off to be safe.

Jill: No, it’s fine, I would have lied anyway to go out with Payton anyway, so don’t worry it’s’ not your fault, I’m a bad girl all on my own.

Sinner: Well you both are looking hot & ready for the town, no doubt.

Payton: Thanks, we try.

Description of them (they can’t see this): Payton is wearing some tight designer jeans and a black “frilly” like blouse. Her hair is teased up above her head somehow and her her first two buttons are not buttoned, it’s a cleavage apocalypses around here. Jill’s wearing a black dress like one piece thing, form fitting, her boobs slapping my space in the face. It doesn’t look sleazy, but her dress is just a bit too slinky to conceal her bra strap. Both are glistening a bit – glossed in makeup. They look really good, could be trouble. I knew I should have jacked off earlier, but decided I might be more bold and make the interview more interesting if I didn’t. Looking like a bad decision. Having been 100% single for a bit now, my libido is unruly if not unpredictable.

Sinner: Okay, I announced this interview earlier four questions were submitted by readers, so let’s get the most offensive ones out of the way so you can storm out now if you’re gong to.

Question 1: “Ask them if they have ever done anything sexual together and ask if they will kiss with tongue so you can see?

Payton: Not that I wouldn’t if I was into that sort of thing because look at her she is freaking gorgeous but no, we like boys.

Jill: yuuuu are the gorgeous one sister, but what said we are strictly dickly. You’ll have to ask her about the kiss part I am fine doing ti.

Payton: I’ll do it bring it on over here, waz up.

Description: Jill gets up and walks around to other side of dining room table where Payton is sitting close to me on my right. I’m at the head of the table, overseer position. Jill throws her arm around Payton who remains seated and I have a perfect view as Jill dives down and plants her lips against Payton’s. They are gratuitous with their tongues, making sure I see. I’m impressed with their commitment to the task, I’m swelling up a little by the time they disengage after about a minute. Fuck me, this is going to be a very long or very short interview I’m thinking. Payton jokes and announces she thinks she might have had an orgasm. I’m starting to figure out that my readers come up with a lot better questions than I do. (thank you question submitter #1, you get a prize.)

Sinner: No shit, I think I might have had an orgasm too, that was way too hot, shame on you both, how dare you.

Jill: I thought it was quite nice, too much?

Sinner: hell no, I mean, I think you answered the reader’s question very well, thank you. Speaking of too much, here is the next reader question:

Jill has finished her drink (screw driver) and I ask her if she wants another while making her assure me she’s not going to have to drive. Payton’s drinking – slower – thankfully as she’s driving. That said, the little per-party they had was clearly effective.

Sinner: Okay, don”t be mad – I’m just the messenger, here is the next reader submitted question: “What is the worst thing they have ever done sexually like their sluttiest moment ever?”

Payton: Oh my, oh that is an awful question, who is this reader, can we talk too them.

Jill: Yes, hers is probably not bad at all, mine is really bad. Can we skip a question if we don’t want to answer? I don”t want to be a spoiled sport but I don’t know this one is bad.

Sinner: I appreciate how difficult of question this is; however, if you pick and choose what to answer, it lets down my readers and ruins the interview. That said, i understand if you wish to discontinue the interview and there will be no hurt feelings if you wish to stop.

I see they need a moment to process the question (holy shit good job question #2 submitter, you killed it) so I go use the rest room while they decide.When I get back Payton has responded with the following.

Peyton: Okay we’ll answer.

Sinner: You both are awesome, thank you – most everybody’s done something “bad,” at some point, have fun, no worries. So, I’ll let you answer and go make a drink.

I go into kitchen to shake a martini, and try to take my time until it sounds like they are done. It seems to take them a while, what the hell could their answers be? When I hear Payton yell “okay, we answered,” I return to the table.

Payton: I am very much straight and only into men now, but I had an affair with a friend, a girlfriend, while in college. It only lasted a few weeks and I was dating my ex husband at the time. I’ve only told one other person about this and never told him. This is hard, okay, I fell head over heels and she broke my heart. It was a strange time, I am not into that but something about her it devastated me.

As I read Payton’s answer, it is silent for the first time since they arrived. Her answer is unexpected – very brave of her to come forth with this. I feel bad for her, I must cheer her up – make her feel okay.

Jill: Mine is really bad and it is so not like me ask P, I’m a professional prude. but on my high school senior trip in Mazatlan I was drunk and had gone through a bad breakup with my HS bf and I one night i got with three guys. at the same time all of them had sex with me in their hotel room. I met them the same night and never saw them again.

It is still silent as I finish reading, fuck, I must say something to make everyone feel okay.

Sinner: Thank you both for your honesty, I thought it was something much worse by how quiet you all were – I’ve heard of much worse – hell, my sister used to have me show her friends my dick in junior high, we all have shit.

Why the hell did I just say that, fuck, I want to real that back in.

Jill: It actually feels sort of good to get that off my chest, thank whoever asked the question for me.

Sinner: For sure, they’ve got life time free anything I publish for the diary. And, you probably think a guy asked that, you’d be wrong.

Sinner to Payton: I’m sorry you had your heart broken. Have you been with another female since?

Sinner to Jill: Is it a traumatic memory – or was it rape or anything like that with the three guys?

Payton: God no, like I said I am not into that. If fact, kissing Jill here was the first time I have kissed a girl since.

Jill: No, it was consensual but cannot say I remember it very well.

Sinner: Really, you don’t remember three men at once very well? Do you have hot memories of it? Do you remember if you came?

Jill: Well I was drunk and it was fifteen years ago, I mean I remember it sort of i’m sure i probably came.

Sinner: you don’t remember if you had an orgasm while three guys were fucking you?

Jill: screw you, fine, yes i am pretty sure i did.

(the second half of this interview gets much much worse from here. I have decided to post thee first half and see how offended people are before posting the rest.)

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Cheating 12: Final conclusion, for now, until I have a different one.

Don’t do it.

Yes, I said it. which is to say, don’t break your vows or promises. If you’re in a sexless marriage, then get permission or get a divorce. Cheating is more about lying that it is about sex, and I believe lying is a sin, not sex.

There are hot stories to read  – fantasy and masturbation is free – none of us have to worry about “not-cheating” ourselves to death.

I’m not judging – not looking to get struck by lightning, I’m just sharing my conclusion – based on the discussion so far.


 


Cheating Series:

Cheating: Issues, Questions & Implications of shifting attitudes towards marital infidelity.
Cheating Part II: How much flirtation is healthy and when does it become infidelity?
Cheating III: Sex in Head, Mental Infidelity
Cheating IV: Anatomy of Infidelity
Cheating Part V: Loopholes, Free Zones and Grey Areas.
Cheating VII: Time Warp Infidelity – Sex After or Before the Relationship?
Cheating 7: When You Stumble Upon Much Better Sex Outside Your Relationship
Cheating 8: Is it Really Sex or affection we Want or is Cheating a Settlement?
Cheating 9: Considering Special Features in Defense of Sexual Infidelity
Cheating 10: Looking for a bit of fun before spilling the beans
Cheating XI: How Not to Sleep With Married People

Payton Interview: horrible sex, great sex, revenge fucks, hot drunk horny friends

Interview with Payton

I needed to get out of the house and went to a local dive bar around 11pm tonight, and there I met Payton and her friend. One of the two is next to me at my kitchen table and agreed to do an interview. It isn’t early. Or, it’s really early.

Sinner: Hi Payton, thank you for braving an interview at this hour, are you ready?

Payton: Ready Freddy.

Sinner: It’s Duncan, but close enough. When did you last have sex?

Payton: Not a fan of foreplay?

Sinner: I am a fan of foreplay, this is it.

Payton: Well if this is your foreplay then..

Sinner: Exactly, contraceptives are recommended for the main questions.

Payton: Should I be scared or excited?

Sinner: You should be scared in a good way and excited in a bad way.

Payton: Well if you must know, the last time was a week ago Saturday. When did you last have sex?

Sinner: Who’s interviewing who here?

Payton: So I can’t ask questions.

Sinner: I had sex Wednesday, sort of.

Payton: What do you mean sort of?

Sinner: I had anal, I guess that counts.

Payton: My my, that might count double. I wonder how that came about? Sorry, I’ll stop asking questions.

Sinner: My ex girlfriend texted and asked if I wanted to fuck. I told her no, unless she wanted anal, then she could come over and I would. So she did and we did, and she left.

Payton:  Sounds like that worked out well for you.

Sinner: It was torture, just trying to do my part. How did your last “experience” come about?

Payton: It was after a date with this guy. I wasn’t going to sleep with him but when he dropped me home, well you know, one thing leading to other things etc.

Sinner: wow, first date sex?

Payton: Third date sex.

Sinner: How would you describe the experience in one word? Amazing?

Payton: Brief.

Sinner: Brief?

Payton: Maybe three minutes. Maybe.

Sinner: Was that enough?

Payton: Enough? Enough for him evidently.

Sinner: So you didn’t come?

Payton: In three minutes?

Sinner: So you didn’t, were you frustrated?

Payton: Not for long, took care of things as soon as he left.

Sinner: With a toy.

Payton: Yup.

Sinner: So, you haven’t seen him since? Have you talked to him?

Payton: Have not seen him. He’s been texting everyday since. He wanted to go out tonight, but Jill (drunk pretty girl you met earlier) wanted to go out.

Sinner: So do you like him? Do you plan to keep seeing him?

Payton: Not sure, I don’t think so. He’s a bit too clingy..

Sinner: And then there’s the three-minute ish

Payton; If that, yes.

Sinner: How about before that? when was the last time?

Payton: Half a year ago, total catastrophe.

Sinner: Catastrophe? This should be good Why, what happened?

Payton:  It was with this guy friend I’ve known since junior high. I think he always had a bit of a crush on me but I was never attracted to him. While I was married my ex and I would hang out with him on occasion.  Sorry, kind of a long story, are you wanting short answers?

Sinner: No, fascinated, please finish, take your time.

Payton: Okay, after my divorce, Doug (the friend) was a shoulder to lean on. He was single but I still was not interested in anything romantic. I should have followed my instincts, but Doug was persistent and eventually persuaded me to give it a shot. Looking back I don’t know what I was thinking.

We had a kiss one night, nothing else, and soon after I relocated out-of-state for a new job. Doug and I continued to communicate long distance, and somehow or another we hatched a plan for him to fly out and visit, to have sex essentially.  I had starte dto feel a little bit of attraction, and He talked a big game – seemed like he might know what he was doing at least, maybe it would be good. It was a bad idea, but he few out for a weekend and we went through with it as planned. We should have stuck with friendship, now it is weird, we have only talked once since.

Sinner: So what happened, the sex wasn’t good

Payton: Yes, was not good. Not only that, but was awkward and embarrassing, for both of us I think. The chemistry was definitely not happening.

Sinner: That sucks. What was bad about the sex, or did it just feel weird because you had been friends for so long? Did he smell? Was it another three-minute situation?

Payton: Pretty much everything that could go wrong did. For starters, Doug had some “stage fright,” (as he defined it) . He never fully got over the “stage fright,” so we fumbled around trying to get started. I was hoping maybe he would get over the stage fright once we go underway. As soon we got started Doug got up, he was in me I’d say not even a minute. I thought maybe he was frustrated about the stage fright or something. I asked him what was wrong, and said, nothing, “I came.”

In my mind, I was wondering  what happened to the hours of passionate love-making he had texted me about. When did he come? He was not even hard and there were no clues that would indicate he was coming, we had not even moved, it was all very strange. I felt bad at first but it bothered me more as I thought about it.

My theory is that he has always wanted to get with me and figured he would say whatever he had to, and score even if it messed up our friendship. It was my choice too, but still, I felt he too advantage because he wanted to have sex regardless of the aftermath that he must have known would no be good.

Sinner: That sucks, sounds very disingenuous. Did you get any sexual pleasure out of the sex?

Payton: None. Hard to even call it sex, basically he put it in and unloaded.

Sinner: Wow. That might be the worst sex story I’ve ever heard.

Payton: The worst I’ve had.

Sinner: This is depressing, have you had any good sexual experiences.

Payton: There was one other when I got divorced that was good.

Sinner: So before Doug, you had good sex?

Payton: it was vacation sex, just a one time thing, but probably the best I have had. For sure the beset, actually. First new sex in eleven years, so that was part it.

Sinner: So your husband left you and then you went on vacation and got laid?

Payton: No, I left him. It actually happened before the divorce. Okay, let me explain. I discovered that my ex was having an affair and the other woman was a friend. I went on vacation with another friend to get some space from the situation and sort things out.

Between you and I, and everyone reading your blog who hopefully were not part of this, I was angry and wanted to hurt him back, so I did it as a revenge fuck. At the time I was thinking that I would have sex with someone to even the score, and then work things out with my husband on equal footing. I never saw the vacation guy again, but it did change my perspective. The next week I returned home and asked for a divorce.

Sinner: I’m sorry about your marriage, and your husband with your friend, that rough. It’s a fascinating story, not that it helps. So you intended to have revenge sex?

Payton: As bad as it may be, yes I did.

Sinner: Wow, did you tell your husband, ex?

Payton: I told him I slept with someone while I was “distraught and drunk” .. in truth it was a bit more intentional, again, that part is between us.

Sinner: That and the part about it being the best sex you ever had.

Payton: Yes, that part too.

Sinner: Was the vacation guy sex was better than it was with your husband.

Payton: No question, my ex was selfish , vacation guy was a giver… and gave, and gave. Lol.

Sinner: Nice.

Payton: (Payton is texting on her phone) Oh god, my friend Jill is checking on me, can’t believe she is still up. She says, “making sure your not chopped up in pieces. Hope I’m not interrupting anything? He’s cute, if I knew how to not be married for a an hour, I’d not be married all  over it.  I shouldn’t have said that, I’m drunk. Plus it’s true shhhhh.”

Sinner: I’m not blushing so don’t even. Tell her to come over, I know a way to not be married for an hour.

Payton: You do?

Sinner: No, lol,  I wish I was a priest right now, I could temporarily dissolve here marriage. But as a priest I couldn’t fuck her, back to the drawing board.

Payton: She’s so drunk, her Nana died and they were close, she never gets like this.

Sinner: She’s hot.

Payton: She is beautiful, for sure.

Sinner: As are you.

Payton: That’s sweet, thank you. I’m cute, Jill’s gorgeous.

Sinner: Maybe, but you have bigger boobs. Speaking of which, we’ll need a photo of them to post with the interview, standard policy.

Payton: Kiss my ass, that’s your policy.

Sinner: Thank you for doing this interview, will you do a part 2 sometime?

Payton: Maybe, perhaps I can talk Jill into doing one with me

Sinner: That would be great, please do. Thank you.


Suggest questions to ask Payton during (hopefully) her followup interview

Date Boners: Tonight I Had a Teenage Dork Moment

Once in a while I’ll have a flash back: not a flashback of a memory, more like my body will forget I’m no longer a teenager.  Which is strange – there’s been plenty of time for this fact to sink in.

You might be wondering, “what’s so bad about that? Who wouldn’t want to feel like a young teen again – for a moment at least? Answer, someone who never knows when such a flash back will happen – and when it always seems to happen at the most inconvenient time.

For example, on a first date with someone – like I was tonight. Have you ever gotten turned on by something so minor that you felt like a total dork? or, horny dog? or, creepy god forbid?

Tonight was so ridiculous. Safe to say I’ve seen enough girls in panties – plenty without for that matter – there’s no excuse for tonight’s reaction. I’m avoiding the details, it’s embarrassing – but here you go…

We were at this bar/restaurant playing pool and talking – very comfortable and innocent situation. The “incident” came up so fast and randomly.

She mentioned she worked  just a couple blocks away from where we were. I told her she should have told me – I could have met earlier so she wouldn’t have had to go home and back. (her home is a ways – over five miles, maybe ten. )

She said, “No, it’s fine, I had to go home and date prep anyway.”

I ask her what she meant by date prep. She rattled of some things.. wash up, have a glass of wine, feed dog, etc. etc… “and put on some pretty underwear of course.”

I was just wanting to verify I heard the last part correctly, and asked, “you put on some pretty underwear?”

“Yea, see,” she said. And she pulls her pants down her hip a bit – flashing me the strap of her panties.

I ask her to show me again – because I wanted to seem more it was too fast to see. The bar was empty (Wednesday) and we were off in the corner – nobody else was in a position to see. Then it happened. She pulled the front of her pants out and down, giving me quick full frontal view of her in her panties: yes, they were “pretty underwear.”

They looked like this:

panties2

It was innocent enough; perhaps you had to be there, but in context it wasn’t sleazy – not as inappropriate as it probably sounds.

What was inappropriate, is that my body had one of these flash backs, and ridiculously, i got a boner.

I know, right? What grown man gets a boner over a two second panty flash? Answer, you’re looking at him. Or, you would be if you were here.

Death by Narcissist

She’ll do what you least expect,
Betray you in ways you never imagined
Turn to stone when your hopes are highest.

She’ll find a way to turn it around,
You’ll take the blame, resent yourself
Love’s no match for her genius.

As soon as you stop hurting,
She’ll seduce you like crazy, only
Setting you up, to break you again.

Debilitating, painful confusion,
Her behavior too unreasonable
To talk about – to admit you allowed..

Becomes your mission, imprisoning,
To see her be fair, show some heart.
it’s hell for you,  to her it’s winning.

 

 

Once in a very great while, I come across someone who makes me wonder – Perhaps God really does exist – maybe somehow, somewhere I could find him.

This time it’s someone who is dead against sex before marriage  – I hate to wonder what she thinks of some of the stuff I’ve posted here on the Diary,  –  If God is out there –  looks like I’m going to have to walk a long way, or at least not have any sex, to reach him.

I very rarely post something like this: in fact, I believe today will be the second time I’ve devoted a post in honor of another blogger. But, I was moved by some things I read on this blog, and also by this video.Stats

If God does exists, I believe there is a high probability that he can be found somewhere on the following blog,  so i thought I’d post links for those looking for him.

Here is a video:
Sex Series, Impotence of the Church

Here is her blog:
Revelations From Daddy in Heaven

Spiritual stories that counsel and educate with dreams, faith and healing.

 

 

 

Place Your Votes on Next Topic. Or, if you think these suck, submit your own.

This week I am leaving it up to the good taste of my readers to choose the topic of my post. Get your votes in quick as I plan to start writing on Saturday.


Here are the choices followed by a form to place your vote:

  1. A second installment of the my new Spice it up series where I suggest naughty things to spice up your sex life.

  2. Short story about two girls I met one night walking home from the bars. They were straight as can be when I met them and practically lesbian before we where through. One friend ended up making the other come in the apartment Jacuzzi.

  3. Go out and ask strangers questions that readers submit and write about the experiences – and post their answers?

  4. Craziest places I’ve made out.

  5. The good, bad, amazing and terror of messing around with co-workers.

Thank you for your input.

SS

 

Is dirty sex overrated? How Dirty have you had it? Do people really want it?

For this discussion, we will define “dirty” as follows: Sexual activity that you probably wouldn’t tell your best friend about – and would give your mother or monsignor a heart attack.

Not to be confused with “naughty” which is: Activity you should not be doing even if it is as simple as holding hands or kissing.

Do you prefer “dirty,” or “naughty?” maybe neither? or, both have their time and place?


Personally, I’ve done more exploration of the “naughty,” and wonder if this is normally the case, or if a lot of people do, or like it dirty?

Actually, dirty comes in handy for masturbating, does it for you? There are some ideas that turn me on in theory – that I am not sure would be so appetizing in reality.

So what is the dirty that I have done? I have had anal sex; but, most people have so perhaps it isn’t so dirty?

I don’t like to talk dirty, usually, but have enjoyed hearing dirty be spoken to me. Okay, I actually like it a lot – when a girl talks dirty – especially when she’s not someone you’d expect to hear such talk from.

Here’s something dirty that I share in my soon to be published volume II of the Sinner Saint Diary. My nineteen year old roommate rim jobbed our ten years older, female landlord. Well, not really rimmed, more like licked and then penetrated while I spread  the older girl’s cheeks.

For those within whom the question has been burning: Yes, it is possible for a woman to have an orgasm, even two, from having her ass tongue-ravaged by a stunning nineteen year old.

That’s about as dirty as it gets with me – I tend more towards the “naughty.”

And you? are you Naughty or Dirty?

or Just no Fun?

Joking, we love you if your pure and wholesome.

Let’s hear the dirty things people are thinking and doing – here’s an anonymous survey –

Privacy note – all responses will be included on this post – anonymously. If you wish to be completely anonymous and not have me know who posted, feel free to leave the name field blank.

All fields are optional – answer what you want. Thank you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Cheating XI: How Not to Sleep With Married People

If you have read a bit of this blog, you probably know that I’ve accidentally hooked up with a few married people. Shut-up – don’t clear your throat – how rude.

In this episode of our cheating series, I wish to share my experience in order to help not sleep with the wrong married people, if you every accidentally do.

If you have been reading the Sinner Saint Diary for a while, you may have noticed that there are not a lot of re-occurring roles, for the married women I have written about. There’s a reason why this doesn’t happen, I’ve gotten my heart broken and learned a few lessons.

Not to not sleep with 1: Don’t sleep with a married person if they aren’t separated or at least wrapping up a divorce. If you do, make it a one time event: don’t date them or make it a routine. And for God’s sake, don’t fall in love with them.

Yes, I know, you have no interested nor intention of falling in love with a married person – I’ve been there too; funny thing about nature, when people fuck regularly, love happens.

But, it’s different with this person you’ve been seeing, right? Perhaps because…

“They don’t even love their (husband/wife), they just can’t leave yet because (insert reason here – financial, kids, spouse is sick, weather is bad, etc)

“They have not slept with their spouse in years, it is basically a roommate situation…”

“We knew it from the moment we met, we are soul mates and we are meant to be, their marriage is just a temporary obstacle on our road to true love bliss…”

These reasons are compelling, I know because I have bought in to them too. I could have saved some heartache had I known: if a person is ready, able and open –  to giving their heart to you or anyone other than their spouse, they would be gone or in the process of leaving.

Maybe they love you, but if they are not determined to end their marriage, there is likely a reason why – and the same reason will prevent their feelings from outlasting the initial infatuation.

BUT: Should you accidentally sleep with them once, good chance it will be really really great! Unless, they stray from their marriage often – which brings us to the next type of married person not to sleep with.

“But, they have an open marriage, sort of, so what’s the harm? They’re just looking for sex and so am I.”

Who to Not to sleep with 2: Are you looking for a disease? Or, shallow encounters that make you feel like you just used a human being as a masturbation device? or, them you?

If the person and their spouse are both into polyamory or whatever the fuck, perhaps it is better – but then it’s not really cheating; however, if the person is cheating with a variety of people, behind their spouses back, is that what you are looking for? someone dishonest, cheap and unavailable?

reader: Fuck this blog! Like I really need more negativity or lectures about things I shouldn’t be doing. #not, #overit, #lickmeDontpreachme

I think I will unfollow — this bullshit is bringing me down!

Hold on a damn second, I’m not finished, so calm the fuck down. And keep reading.

… Are we calm?

Um, Why are you touching yourself there?

Okay, where was I? Yes, was getting to the “how to not sleep with the right married people section,” happy?

Who is better to not sleep with: The Beluga of married persons to hookup with, are those undergoing a temporary separation: You’ve probably heard me comment on this before – for good reason, there’s only one reason for the “temporary separation” … actually there are two – and both are good news for you:

1. The married person wants to fuck someone else (you) so bad, they incurred the expense and went through the drama to  move out of their damn home.

2. They were not getting any “on the side” before the separation, and won’t be getting any when the separations ends – or else they would not have to move out to “separate.” 

For anyone fooling themselves, who thinks a temporary separation is not so the married person can screw their brains out for a short time without having to account for it, you must be the spouse of one, and it’s better you know the truth.

There is the same danger of falling in love with the separated married person – don’t do it. They are probably even less likely to leave their marriage for you. They’ll rock your world and wreck you – all in a few months time – and by the time you come back to, they’ll be back with their spouse and all but forgotten you.

It is one of those laws of marital nature, if they go through all the trouble of a temporary separation, they are strongly committed. And, they are doing it because they want to fuck, Period!

They will never admit it and will likely take what you do with them to their grave, while their spouse thinks they were reading self help books and focusing on “getting healthy.” 

And now for the very worst and very best married person you should not sleep with…

Worst person to not sleep with: While you avoid sleeping with married people, avoid double the married person who’s been living on their own for any significant amount of time and no divorce papers have been signed.

This situation comes with the most risk and the least reward. There is some reason why divorce still has not happened; it must be a strong reason, or it would have!- How many happy, safe reasons can you think of – as to why a person would live alone for a long time without divorce?

Exactly, it’s creepy. Besides, they’ve had their freedom for a while, and getting a slice is no big thing; they have already been through their fucking-like-a-rabid-teenage-Rabbit-phase.

Perhaps they want your help to extricate them from their abusive husband Guido? or, their borderline psycho wife Haterknifeloveress, how happy would that fun be?

Very Best Person to not ever sleep with: We will end up on an up note and talk about the very best married person to accidentally sleep with…

But first!

I just remembered…

Another consideration: This is a caveat to the best option: While the penultimate accident to fall upon, can be with a person who’s ink is still fresh on the divorce papers – if they were not in favor of ending their marriage, especially if they were cheated on, prepare for tears in place or orgasms.

Why you ask?

Think back to relationships you have ended and those who have ended you. Were you not over the one’s you ended much faster? And, when you’ve been let go, did it not sort of make you want them even more? Their mind will be on them and they don’t want to fuck, if they do it’s stick it to their ex.

But with the non-jilted spouse who just wants out…

Did you ever go to disneyland as a child? Remember the anticipation in the car when the first ride had been spotted? Or, remember what the last hour of class before summer vacation used to feel like – how it seemed to last an eternity? All the energy you felt – perhaps a fog of euphoria – when you  broke free and the limitlessness and freedom of summer began?

Fair enough, you might get the dirtier sex from the separated spouse or the one trapped for life in a sexless marriage. But, you and the the almost unchained, will have hopeful, laughing sex.. and they will soon be available if you accidentally fall head over heals.


Cheating Series:

Cheating: Issues, Questions & Implications of shifting attitudes towards marital infidelity.
Cheating Part II: How much flirtation is healthy and when does it become infidelity?
Cheating III: Sex in Head, Mental Infidelity
Cheating IV: Anatomy of Infidelity
Cheating Part V: Loopholes, Free Zones and Grey Areas.
Cheating VII: Time Warp Infidelity – Sex After or Before the Relationship?
Cheating 7: When You Stumble Upon Much Better Sex Outside Your Relationship
Cheating 8: Is it Really Sex or affection we Want or is Cheating a Settlement?
Cheating 9: Considering Special Features in Defense of Sexual Infidelity
Cheating 10: Looking for a bit of fun before spilling the beans
Cheating XI: How Not to Sleep With Married People