Do you ever lose yourself, your voice ever hide or go away? Reality is rough, right? or, is it just that I’m’ crazy?

In younger years when my optimism was less eroded, openness was the whole point, and it was easy:  it was my focus, all that mattered; as long as the feed was directly what I was feeling – communication was obvious and relatively effortless.

And now, not for lack of  sincerity or wishful thinking, i lose my mind. I lose my heart for a while – to wherever it goes to cry, break, die.

When parts of me are doing the hiding, I suck. The writing means nothing, I’m not engaging, I am voiceless, pointless and withering. I know, It is most sound not to think in absolutes – nobody is all bad or all good; we’re not superhuman; most of us aren’t brilliant, but have our moments – most not simple, but sometimes we expose a shameful flaw, give away an ignorance.

Are we all so unsteady? am I just crazy? Why do I lose touch for  periods of time?

I wish there was God.

I  hope there is a God.

I am sorry for writing crap and faking it these times when I cannot find myself and have nothing else for you.