10 things I’ve learnt from being a slut

I found this post particularly true and insightful. Check out the author’s blog, Innocence Lost And Found, for many more honest, intelligent, fascinating posts and true accounts of the blogger’s life.

Innocence Lost And Found, spares no intimate details – explicit while meaningful, addicting, daring, shocking, wise, nasty and classy.
Link to Original Post on Innocence Lost And Found



1. If they like you, they will show it. If they don’t, they won’t.

If he wants to see you, he will see you.  If he likes you, he will message and definitely respond to your messages.  If he finds you attractive, he will make a move.  If he’s not into you, if he’s over you, if he’s turned off for whatever reason, he will show it.  As hard as that is to accept of someone you may like, stop making excuses and stop trying to retrace your steps to find what you did wrong – you can’t say the wrong thing to the right person.  (This applies equally for men and women – my experience on the receiving side has been with men, of course, but I know damn well what it’s like having an unattractive guy interested in me.  You don’t just “forget” to reply to someone you are interested in).


2. Don’t knock it till you’ve tried it.

Spanking, threesomes, facials…these are just three of the many things that used to sound uninteresting or repulsive to me until I tried them and became a total convert.  Give it a try before you dismiss it completely – and definitely before you judge anyone else for doing it.


3. You can probably have any man you want – it may just be for the night, though.

I have been with many drop dead gorgeous men in my time – all way above my league, by the way.  This has actually been detrimental to my search for a companion, because now I can’t settle for average-looking guys anymore.  Of course, not all of these adventures have led to love or commitment, but at the very least they’ve given me a wild night and a good story.  In fact, I can’t think of a single example where I haven’t easily gotten a guy I wanted.  As a woman I have so many ways to raise my league – hair, makeup, cleavage, clothes – and I use them all for the chance to touch a beautiful man.


4. You don’t need to cum to have great sex.

Of course, being with someone who is willing and able to make you orgasm is great, but it’s nothing I can’t do myself.  Give me non-orgasmic, wild, rough sex with a gorgeous man over multiple orgasms with a skilled guy with a dad bod any day.  For me, sex is about the privilege of enjoying the body of someone I find attractive, and watching them take pleasure in me.  The sense of satisfaction and achievement gained from looking at a cum-drained and panting Adonis and thinking “I did that” is up there with the best feelings in the world.  Besides, if I want to cum, I can do it myself – quickly and efficiently – any time I want.

5. Chemistry is king, the rest is bonus.

I’ve been pursued by men who are billionaires, men who are kind and good, men doing interesting things and would definitely be good matches for me on paper.  And I’ve tried to give them a chance, but I’ve realized that I’ll never be someone who can “grow” to be attracted to someone.  Either your hotness gives me an asthma attack every time I see you, or I want to cry when you lean in to kiss me and vomit at the thought of touching you.  If we can cross that hurdle, then I can start considering all the “important” stuff, like character and bank balance.

6. Porn has way too strong an influence.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m into anal, deep throat and facials as much as the next guy, but men are ridiculously impressionable.  And many of the things that they believe to be normal sexual practice have been drip fed into their brains by porn and become more assimilated into their systems with every wank.  To the point where they get impatient and think it’s your fault if you don’t cum within five minutes of the acrobatics they’ve been led to believe is the way to a woman’s pleasure centre.  The clit is just an afterthought to hit up with a token rub every now and then.  Don’t get me wrong, I love all of it.  But if really want to make me cum, it’s as simple as a few minutes of gentle and consistent clit-stroking, without switching it up with all kinds of bells and whistles like a vaginal DJ.  It may not be entertaining for you, but that’s what it takes.

7. There’s no reigniting the spark.

Sometimes it’s a gradual thing – years of banality or irritating behaviour grinds your passion to nothing.  Sometimes it’s a one-off beat-boxing display or equally embarrassing act that turns you off.  Sometimes you realize something about them, such as a tea-like body odour or resemblance to David Walliams from which, once noticed, there’s no coming back.  But once that sexual spark is gone, the relationship is beyond repair – no matter how hot he is.

8. Every man thinks his dick is big.

Women are generally pretty aware of their flaws.  And even if it doesn’t stop us from having a good time in bed or showing off our bodies, it’s not something we would necessarily draw attention to.  I have yet to meet the man who isn’t proud of his dick.  Sometimes I see a dick so small that I can’t hide the disappointment, but I genuinely believe they interpret my expression as one of intimidation at the mightiness of their powerful member.  Guys, if your cock really is big, she’ll probably comment on it.  If she doesn’t say anything, be grateful for her politeness and check your ego.

9. In bed, kindness is more important than honesty.

Having been a victim of dishonesty from men, I cannot emphasize enough how much I value honesty and how vital it is to any meaningful relationship.  But that doesn’t mean you have to spew a gush of word vomit when it comes to your sex life.  Men like to think they are open-minded and may ask lots of questions about your experience and fantasies.  At the time it may be a turn on for them to hear you talking dirty.  Be very careful about how much you choose to share though.  Chances are their fragile egos won’t be able to deal with it and they will become obsessed to the point where it changes their opinion of you.  Keep some of it back for your friends and blog.  Also, just like “do I look fat in this?” is a loaded question, so is “is my dick big?”.  They don’t want to hear the truth.  Just say yes.

10. Size matters.

It just does.  And bigger is better – psychologically and physically.  Life is unfair.

Innocence Lost And Found

  1. If they like you, they will show it. If they don’t, they won’t.

If he wants to see you, he will see you.  If he likes you, he will message and definitely respond to your messages.  If he finds you attractive, he will make a move.  If he’s not into you, if he’s over you, if he’s turned off for whatever reason, he will show it.  As hard as that is to accept of someone you may like, stop making excuses and stop trying to retrace your steps to find what you did wrong – you can’t say the wrong thing to the right person.  (This applies equally for men and women – my experience on the receiving side has been with men, of course, but I know damn well what it’s like having an unattractive guy interested in me.  You don’t just “forget” to reply to someone you are…

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